Cap’n Tony ‘Ahab’ Nichols

More news on Bristol City Council’s Docks service and the bullying, incompetent loony they’ve got in charge down there, Cap’n Tony ‘Ahab’ Nichols. We’ve now been reliably informed that to help steady Ahab’s listing ship and manage the growing storm of public Outrage over his dodgy management practices and shit attitude, the council has dragged in a troubleshooter.

Welcome, then to our old friend, the private sector property boss paid from the public purse Robert ‘Spunkface’ Orrett, to take personal charge of matters.

Those with longer memories may recall Spunkface took “personal responsibility” for the council’s bent Markets service in early 2013 – only for the boss directly accountable for markets, Facilities Management boss, Tony Harvey, to kill himself by early 2014. No doubt Ahab is suitably chilled by this news too.

And what a start for Spunkface, with the BLATANT AND UNLAWFUL blocking by him and Ahab – who, between them, trouser more than £100k every year out of your Council tax – of a Freedom of Information request asking to see Ahab’s Docks service accounts.

It’s now been well over fifty days since the request went in, and we’re assured intervention by the Information Commissioner is “imminent” if these accounts aren’t produced pronto.

General opinion seems to be that Spunkface and Ahab are desperate to keep these accounts away from the public because they’re likely to reveal a Markets service-style BENT MANAGEMENT CULTURE of personal financial favours and deals that will have cost the council taxpayer a small fortune. The BRISTOLIAN has already been tipped to find out how much Mayor Ferguson’s former shit- pub-in-an-old-tug, the Grain Barge, hasn’t paid in mooring fees over the years.

Meanwhile, The BRISTOLIAN continues to receive plenty of tip-offs regarding Ahab. Complaints include his failure to not properly clean the docks, resulting in lots of rubbish floating around which wraps it self around boat propellers and threatens aquatic wildlife.

Ahab’s crap decision to shut the harbour Office early to bunk off home is another. In the past anybody who wanted to launch a boat into the harbour to enjoy the light evenings over the summer months was able to pay a fee at the office and float away.

No longer- the office is now shut. The fee also used to contain a small amount for third party and public liability insurance should there be any accidents, meaning that some control was kept over who was actually able to launch a boat. Now now; any idiot can launch, with neither any fees gathered or any insurance cover should they have a prang.

That’s progress Ahab style.