SPADstic and Lazy in happier times before they decided to fuck up one of the city’s parks and become objects of mass derision

We have an early entrant for our IDLE SELF-PUBLICIST COUNCILLOR of the year award. Please step forward Labour’s councillor for Windmill Hill, “Lazy” Lucy Whittle.

LIVID RESIDENTS of Windmill Hill and Totterdown – fuming over her and her politically ambitious colleague Jon “SPADstic” Wellington’s top secret plan to build a bloody great ROAD through their beloved Victoria Park – were desperately emailing Lazy Lucy in December only to be greeted by an out of office message.

“Thank you for contacting me, I am currently on SICK LEAVE but expect to be able to return to work within a few weeks, hopefully at the end of December,” bleated Lucy.

Fair enough. We all get ill and can’t work. But wait! What should pop through residents’ doors in late December/early January but a copy of the South Bristol Voice newspaper featuring a ‘Your councillors’ column written by none other than LAZY LUCY, merrily wittering away, without a care in the world, about the awfulness of the cuts she’ll be voting to implement this year.

What type of STRANGE ILLNESS is this that afflicted Lazy Lucy over the Christmas holidays? Too ill to reply to residents’ emails but well enough to write an article promoting herself and taking advantage of free PR in the local freesheet? Truly, an extraordinary condition.

Lazy Lucy and sidekick, SPADstic, may be trying to avoid residents after they supported a SECRET three month public consultation by cycling and concrete charity, Sustrans, into the so-called ‘Filwood Quietway’ through Victoria Park.

This is basically a plan – going to a planning committee next week – for a FIVE METRE WIDE ROAD for cyclists to SPEED through the park on. And, despite Lazy and SPADstic’s comprehensive three month consultation over the summer, virtually no residents knew anything about it!

Unless, that is, they happened to wander into a BICYLE REPAIR GAZEBO in Victoria Park on the afternoon of Wednesday 31 August or they were invited to a few mysterious PRIVATE, invitation-only meetings with the mendacious pair of Labour councillors and Sustrans’ posh engagement manager, Anais “Nincompoop “Leger-Smith.

To add INSULT TO INJURY, Lazy Lucy even used her South Bristol Voice PR column in October to discuss her road-through-the-park plan in vague terms, telling residents, “we are really interested in what the community thinks. So do let us know your thoughts,” a week after the consultation CLOSED!

Lazy Lucy also gave the road Labour’s SUPPORT in her column, telling residents, “[SPADstic and I] see this as an improvement to Bristol’s cycling infrastructure that will bring benefits to communities along its route.”

Now SPADstic, apparently alone and abandoned by sickly Lazy Lucy, and desperate to salvage his six-month car crash career is attempting a REVERSE FERRET at the kind of furious speeds cyclists will soon be doing across his local park.

As hundreds of objections pour in from residents – as they finally find out about the road SPADstic forgot to tell them about – SPADstick is desperately issuing VAGUE and PISS WEAK promises to support the residents he deliberately sidelined and ignored during the three month consultation.

Too little; too late we say. Why did Lazy Lucy and SPADstic DELIBERATELY allow this plan get to a planning committee before telling residents? And why – if their consultation with Anais NIncompoop from cycling’s concrete kings – has been such a comprehensive listening exercise, are HUNDREDS of residents and every community group and school in the area UP IN ARMS about it?

The plan needs to go back to the drawing board and these idiot councillors need to apologise to their residents for their appalling conduct and start doing their jobs properly. Or else.


  1. Cotham Cider

    Cyclists on Facebook have given this scheme a kicking as well. Someone pointed out that the money spent in Victoria Park will do “nothing to alleviate the real problem”.

    Yes, it’s a classic solution in search of a problem. Or rather a wedge of ring fenced government money in search of somewhere to spend it.

    Sadly for the backpedalling councillor his previous support is still being quoted for all to see

    1. The Bristol Blogger

      It’s also a route to nowhere. It takes riders to Whitehouse Lane, a light industrial area in the back end of Bedminster. They don’t how to link the park to the route going south either. Big danger it will end up as a random 1km stretch of tarmac in a park.

  2. Madelaine

    Why do you feel you have to slander others because of your political views? Can you not air your objections without stooping so low as to say people who take sick leave are lazy?!!!!! Let alone what else you infer!-yet you seem to have no idea of the council process regarding this matter. You have absolutely NO idea what is going on in those two councillors lives I’m sure! Let’s hope the councillor you talk about’s sick leave was not for example for cancer treatment or to nurse a dying parent/or child. Your supposed political views are aired as deeply personal vicious comments and I’m sure must be very painful for those two councillors to read. If I was ill or no doubt trying my best in what must be an extremely difficult job mopping up the world injustices and resulting mass hysteria, your malicious comments would be enough to top me off. What about trying to create change with some love in your heart whoever you are? You’ll just create more pain and more of what you hate with your vindictive approach.

    1. The Bristol Blogger

      Can you read? You cannot be on sick leave and be publishing articles in a fucking newspaper. If any city council employee did this, they’d need to explain while they were working while signing off sick. It’s actually fraudulent. You’re the one with no idea about council processes on this matter.

      As for the rest, these councillors don’t like it up ’em do they? if this pair want to treat us, their community, like cunts – by sidelining us why they make deals with corporate interests to pave over our park – then we will treat them exactly the same. Like cunts. That’s how life works around here.

  3. Cotham Cider

    Cutting services with one hand and trying to wave through a 500k (!) cycle path that no-one needs and few even want with the other. Yeah these councillors really do a “difficult job”, the put-upon, brave little soldiers that they are.

    1. The Bristol Blogger

      The pair worked really hard privately meeting multiple times with VPAG, the parks group, and TRESA, the community group, trying to divide the community by getting these groups onside.

      Shame it failed and they now face the wrath of a united community. Short, cheap and nasty political careers from the rookies here.

  4. O

    It’s funny that the writer of this article is a Labour member and could be kicked out of the Labour party if this article was brought up with the complicance unit

  5. The Bristol Blogger

    Would your compliance unit kick out a councillor for lying to their electorate? Or is deceit and incompetence acceptable in your Labour Party?

  6. Jn

    Think it is a shame it will not be going ahead. I get your point about it.being a vanity project going nowehre. But having moved this side from east where we had bristol/bath cycle track it is not easy or nice to cycle from here. Roads are dangerous. Real lack of cycling places. Having been here since june i notice objection to growth or anything new. It answers what I had always wondered “don’t go south of the river”.


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