Monthly Archives: August 2021

REVEREND’S SEMI NAKED PRAYER CIRCLE IN FRISBEE FROLIC SHOCKER?

frisbee
“The plebs should shut up and play frisbee while I piss public money away,” explains the Reverend Rees

To keep us entertained over the summer holidays, the Reverend Rees has done an interview with ‘Premier Christianity’, which, it says here, is “the UK’s leading Christian magazine”. Possibly not the hardest crown to claim in this day and age.

Among the Reverend’s fascinating insights, we find that “we live in a complicated world” and that his version of ‘levelling up’, Bojo’s hapless policy for the red wall constituencies, “actually makes sense“!

Further gems include the Reverend explaining his jobs-for-evangelical-mates policy. “What we’ve seen over recent years is the churches really beginning to step into city leadership, because I’ve offered that challenge,” he explains. Carefully sidestepping any job offers or cash that might have accompanied his “challenge”.

Your caring, sharing BRISTOLIAN even gets a mention. “You get your trolls,” whines the Reverend. “Some rag started to call me “Reverend Rees” and all that type of stuff and said I was trying to introduce a theocracy. But so much of that trolling stuff is such nonsense. It just washes over you.

Indeed. It’s washing over him so thoroughly, he makes a point of mentioning this “nonsense” in his keynote interview about his Christian faith.

He then continues letting it “wash over” in bizarre and considerable detail. “The way I see it is if there’s a 60-year-old man in his underpants late at night writing mean things to people on the internet, you just think: “What has your life come to?” [Laughs] I mean, you know, take up a hobby, pick up a frisbee, do something!

Something” like, maybe, swanking around the Council House in a spiv’s suit calling yourself a ‘City Leader’? Or bullying female councillors to boost your flagging ego and to hide your gross incompetence? Or awarding jobs and funds to your best mates, the all-male Hope Chapel Prayer Circle Loonies? Last seen in 2020 claiming their prayers had kept Covid levels low in Bristol.

Unfortunately we’re unable to confirm if the Reverend and his gang of boys in the evangelical band strip down to their kecks and play frisbee before they pray for us.

But the Reverend’s fertile imagination must find inspiration somewhere, surely?