Category Archives: Overheard/Spotted

Is nowhere in the city safe for the High & Mighty to quietly conspire?!

ANTONA COURT: THROUGH THE KEYHOLE

keyhole-variant_318-54667More fun and games at Antona Court, the council owned residence of notorious housing activist and friend of the Bristolian, Steve “STORMIN'” Norman.

After 18 months of deranged accusations and smears emanating from the council’s housing service management pillock Nick “DROOPER” Hooper, Steve (and everyone else in the block including children) is now being subjected to camera surveillance from a PEEPING TOM weirdo resident while the council does nothing!

Last week, a female friend of Steve’s noticed – while walking through the communal hallway of Antona Court – a small CAMERA trained on her from the open LETTERBOX of one of the flats. Deciding she didn’t wish to be filmed by some sad old man, she pushed the camera back through the letterbox and went to visit Steve.

Alas, this did not go down well with the Nick “Drooper” Hooper’s new Peeping Tom SPY OPERATIVE who then proceeded to tell Steve that he would attack him with a baseball bat if his dodgy camera was touched again!

Steve, concluding that it might be better to engage with the authorities rather than beat the Peeping Tom to a finely juiced pulp, contacted Drooper’s NORTH BRISTOL ESTATES FALSE ALLEGATION UNIT to complain and they visited Antona Court last week.

Only to explain that the tenant in their view was doing NOTHING WRONG and they were happy for him to continue filming in the communal area of their flats if he wished.

Do you reckon if Steve were doing the filming that Drooper and his False Allegation Unit would be so lenient?

The council’s view also contradicts the police who have told Steve, if the council were to cooperate, they would assist in serving an ASBO on the Peeping Tom for fairly obvious reasons.

Meanwhile residents at Antona Court are voting with their feet. One grandmother is REFUSING to take her grand daughter through the hallway and past the camera. Presumably on the basis she doesn’t want some aging pervert filming her young grand daughter and retaining the footage for his personal use?

Other residents are requesting moves from the block to get away from Drooper’s freakish and anti-social SPY NETWORK.

Now the issue has now been handed to Drooper’s colleague Mary “Contrary” Ryan to resolve. Will she continue to allow the private filming of children and young women in communal areas of Antona Court or will she see sense?

Watch this space …

OH FUCK! MAYOR TELLS MEMBER OF THE PUBLIC TO ‘FUCK OFF’

Is our under pressure elected Mayor cracking already? Or is it an early run for the council’s new honest approach to consultation – “I’ve listened to you – now fuck off OK”?

It starts at around 1 minute 40 seconds in. Enjoy …

[youtube=http://youtu.be/Lb5OFukKqDg]

 

 

HOYT’S HATE TWEET SCANDAL SHAME SHOCKER

Hoyt's hate crime scandal shame

It is with great concern that The BRISTOLIAN passes on news received today from a reader relating to embattled Green councillor, SIR GUS HOYTY-TOYTY.

It was only yesterday that GEORGE’S MINISTER FOR FREE-RANGE BEARDS vowed to never again “walk while I tweet” after prompting an international race hate scandal with his announcement that he “hated aborigines”. Diplomatic relations between Bristol and Australia were briefly severed before a hastily convened summit meeting established that Gusbo had actually meant to broadcast his loathing of aubergines – which in turn precipitated a rift between Shitty Hall and the Soil Association.

Councillor Hoyty-Toyty’s frantic attempts to row back from the political precipice seemed to work, but were then potentially self-scuppered when he promised to refer to the vegetable in question by its racially-charged American name, ‘eggplant’ – recalling 2009’s COCONUTGATE SCANDAL caused by Shirley ‘Not A Racist’ Brown-Marshall, the Lib Dem councillor he subsequently replaced in Ashley ward.

Yet less than 24 hours after his pledge to stop ‘tweet-walking’,  our tipster spotted the CUDDLY GREEN TEDDY BEAR flagrantly and feverishly tapping into his smartphone whilst striding along pushing his expensive bike and with a £200 solar-powered inflatable vegetable rucksack on his back, in an apparent dash to get to the Farmers’ Market at St. Nick’s before all the organic quinoa disappeared in the lunchtime rush.

Councillor Toyty – we implore you – SEEK HELP. If it is not treated, and soon, this compulsion of yours will sink your political career.

OVERHEARD: COMER CHAMELEON

Can anyone tell Steve Comer where he is?

Spotted in a café in Redfield recently was monk-haired Lib Dem councillor for Eastville, STEVE ‘IN A’ COMER, furtively in conflab with an unknown man.

We understand that the two had an intriguing conversation, the highlight of which was Comer quietly pronouncing that:

Of course, you don’t need to have compulsory redundancies…

Just what could that enigmatic comment mean? And what was Comer’s erstwhile pie-loving, one-man seventies TV cop show tribute GARY HOPKINS doing in the same café a few days later, so far away from his own stomping ground in Knowle?

Far be it from us at The BRISTOLIAN to suggest reasons why Comer, a former member of the national executive of civil servants’ union PCS, might be so keen to point out easier ways of making people jobless – but certainly his colleagues in the UK Border Agency might like to ask him…