in previous issues, The BRISTOLIAN has been exposing how an EXTREMIST WEIRDO Californian Christian cult known as BETHEL SCHOOL OF SUPERNATURAL MINISTRY (BSSM) wields UNDUE and DISTURBING influence over Our Reverend Mayor, challenging the secular nature of his office.
Buzzing around Bristol Bridge on Monday, THE FLY was able to savour the
delicious aroma of GREENWASH BULLSHIT served up by MIDDLE CLASS TWATS.
Yes, it was the start of a week long ‘protest’ in Bristol city centre
organised by our favourite WELL HEELED, CORPORATE-BACKED ‘environmental
emergency social movement’, Extinction Rebellion.
The surreal sight that assaulted The Fly’s compound eyes from all
directions included flags and banners, a few stalls, gazebos and tents, a
bright pink yacht in the middle of Bristol Bridge, a DJ sound-system,
meditation groups, signs that said ‘Get In The Boat’, or ‘Get On Your
Bike’ (a sore point maybe for those of us from the bug world with long
memories), a samba parade blanketed in the COPYRIGHTED XR logo with one
or two active ‘callers’ and a mass of passive ‘responders’, and hippie
stoners chatting away to the cops, some of them openly skinning up only
feet away from the ever-smiling filth.
There were legal observers too, in case anyone got arrested (for
lighting up a joint just a bit too close to a cop maybe?), but obviously
with not much to do. Bristol City Council and their cheerful cop
friends were so obliging that BCC even PROVIDED CONCRETE BOLLARDS later
on to give the ‘protest’/love-in an air of permanence, all paid for
through one of their contractors.
Taking shelter from the sun and the overt Glasto-hippie atmosphere under
the ‘information’ gazebo, The Fly overheard one Bristol punter ask
questions as to how XR was organised and how its decisions were made.
The punter was told that all XR decisions were made by ‘those people
with influence and qualification in the movement’, in what was described
as a ‘post-democratic structure’(?). Feedback from the plebs however
was possible, through the (remember Occupy, anyone?) format of
assemblies’, a few of which the decision-makers and their wow-celebrity
friends might deign to consider at some point in the future.
Later on, the samba parade shuffled off through the city centre,
blocking off streets and trailing round the Bear Pit – not once but
twice, and perched by a bus stop as multi-colour ragged hippies
leafleted the queues of traffic drivers and patiently waiting bus
queues, The Fly listened in to the reactions of some more Bristol
punters. The overall response was one of bemusement, sighs, weary
laughs, and in some cases frustration and anger.
The punters were by and large FULLY AWARE of the issues and how SERIOUS
they are, but DIDN’T CONNECT in any way to the XR protestors or their
activities. Questions were raised like What’s the point of such tactics?
What’s the message here, beyond sound bites? ARE THEY ALL HIPPIES? Why
stop our public transport to make a point about private cars on the
road? Why don’t they instead OCCUPY the head offices of the offending
FOSSIL FUEL corporations and their COLLABORATOR government agencies?
Might support them then… Listening to these authentic Bristol voices,
The Fly rubbed its legs together in contemplation. Clearly, such voices
were NOT going to get the biggest cheers at the ‘peoples assembly’ of
yogi-flyers levitating above Bristol Bridge.
So what exactly have XR achieved in their first year or so of existence,
beyond some empty ‘declaration’ by government bodies of a ‘climate
emergency’, followed as always by business as usual? XR don’t get that a
changing-of-the-guard that ‘works within’ an alleged ‘green’ capitalism
is going to do fuck all – this way we get at the most a few years
respite from disaster, plus a whole bucket-load of bullshit betrayals
that in addition may discredit the entire environmental movement. Are XR
ever going to realise that the ONE AND ONLY POSSIBLE chance of saving
our world from the onrushing Four Horsemen is to DESTROY CAPITALISM
UTTERLY, to dig it out root and branch once and for all through A GLOBAL
That will sure as hell mean you lose your happy, obliging cops, the fair
weather friends, the nice friendly politicians and media coverage, but
you GET THE PEOPLE, and can instead authentically call up the MASS
MOBILISATION necessary to bring in the total-system-changing measures
that are required to get our planet through the
mother-of-all-shit-storms that’s coming.
Without such an understanding, XR is itself yearning for extinction. As
for THE FLY, it and its scorned, despised, ignored fellow bugs prepare
to pad over the soon-to-be decomposing corpse, seeking the orifices in
which to lay their eggs and start anew.
less than a year in post and many at the Counts Louse are unhappy with the
Reverend’s new Head of Paid Service, MIKE
“I’M YOUR BITCH” JACKSON, the £165k a
year replacement for the highly costly and abysmally useless, Anna “Big
Indeed Lib Dem Anthony “Arthur” Negus is already demanding a “FUTURE DISCUSSION ON THE POST OF HEAD OF PAID SERVICE“. This comes after what Negus describes as the “politicising of replies to members’ questions at Full Council that cross the line.”
This is a reference to the Reverend Rees’s increasingly SAD AND BITCHY RESPONSES to any opposition councillor trying to hold him to account at their monthly q&a sessions. These catty political responses, it seems, are often PERSONALLY DRAFTED FOR THE REVEREND WITH GREAT PRIDE BY JACKSON who, despite being a neutral civil servant, appears to enjoy pleasuring the mayor in this way.
The big problem here is that unelected Jackson, having spent a year BITCHING AND SNIPING AT ELECTED COUNCILLORS opposing the Reverend, may find they will not want to work with him if they gain office next year.
Who could blame them? Meanwhile, Green councillor Clive “Shakin” Stevens has also been expressing his RESERVATIONS ABOUT JACKSON and especially the close relationship and strong male bond there appears to be between this objective and independent senior local government officer and the elected Mayor. “IT’S NOT POSSIBLE TO TRUST THIS ARRANGEMENT,” says Shaky darkly.
Shall we start organising Jackson’s leaving party for next May now as few are likely to be prepared to work with a former Mayor’s bitch? And why should they be?
The annual debate at Full Council on the city council’s pay policy had a certain fairytale quality to it this year, entirely due to the Reverend’s hapless OVERPAID EXECUTIVE ARSEHOLE, Colin “Head Boy” Molton’s unorthodox employment and salary arrangements – yet again – taking centre stage.
“The salary for Executive Director roles will range from £135,000 to £165,000 with a mid-point of £150,000,” chirped the Reverend’s LUDICROUS REPORT prepared by HR committee chair and Labour loyalist councillor John “Smelly” Wellington, entirely overlooking Executive Director, Head Boy’s £350K A YEAR PRO RATA HANDOUT.
“The Council’s top earner will be on a salary of up to £165,000 and the lowest-paid person will be on a salary of at least £17,364. This means that the Council’s top to lowest salary ratio is 9.50:1,” Smelly Welly’s report SHAMELESSLY continued, entirely overlooking Executive Director, Head Boy’s £350K A YEAR PRO RATA HANDOUT.
THIS COMPLETE AND UTTER BOLLOCKS attracted the attention of quite a few opposition councillors and even left many Labour councillors shifting uncomfortably in their seats at the Reverend’s latest BRAZEN INSULT to the people of Bristol and their elected representatives.
Although it was Tory Richard
“Bunter” Eddy who, perhaps, best summed up the mood. “Since the
interim director of growth and regeneration receives £275,000 and this is not
reflected in the pay policy table, this makes a COMPLETE MOCKERY of the report,” said Bunter.
“This report is utterly bogus and
not worth the paper it’s printed on,” he concluded.
For years a Bristol City Councillor has sat QUIETLY, INEFFECTIVELY AND INCONSEQUENTIALLY as a non-executive director of the Merchant Venturer-run PORT OF BRISTOL COMPANY at Avonmouth. This councillor is supposed to protect our public investment in the firm as well as independently oversee the company, its finances and management to ensure it’s acting lawfully.
at last, a councillor has stepped up and admitted that he QUIT this non-Exec role two years ago as he was PREVENTED from effectively overseeing
the firm as the law requires and he was concerned this CONFLICTED with his responsibilities under the council’s code of
Green Councillor Clive Stevens told a council scrutiny committee that the
demand from the Port of Bristol Company that he sign a GAGGING ORDER preventing him from discussing any issues regarding
the company shackled him from independently overseeing the company and conflicted
with his primary role to be OPENLY AND
DIRECTLY ACCOUNTABLE TO THE PUBLIC .
also raises further questions. Like what the hell port owners, the scummiest of
Merchant Venturer scum, David Ord “Ure” and “Tory” Terrence
Mordaunt, think they’re doing NOBBLING
DEMOCRATICALLY ELECTED REPRESENTATIVES AND INDEPENDENT NON-EXECUTIVE DIRECTORS of
their firm? Or why our councillors have colluded with this legally dubious
corporate management culture for years and why were they putting up with
anti-democratic bullshit from a couple of wealthy Tory boys on the make?
The council’s Head of Legal Services has agreed to look at the matter and
produce a report. Will he have learned anything from the 2008 banking crisis
and the need for genuinely independent non executive directors TO PROTECT THE PUBLIC FROM THIEVING
CORPORATE BASTARDS WITH NO MORALS?
FANATICAL REMAINER, Labour’s goth MP for Bristol East, Kerry “And the Banshees” McCarthy, took an interesting approach to the final weekend of campaigning in the recent Euro elections, which were a disaster for Labour.
the Saturday before the elections, the pint-size goth announced on Twitter she
was NOT campaigning in East Bristol
but going to Wales to walk up Mount Snowdon with fellow 80s indie music nerd,
Labour Deputy leader, Tom “Student Grant” Watson.
How many voters Labour’s indie odd couple canvassed on top of the mountain is
unclear. What is clear, however, is that another move on Corbyn’s leadership by
Labour’s Parliamentary Party BLAIRITE
ULTRAS and REMAINERS, blaming
him for the inevitable election defeat, is a foregone conclusion.
latest assault will come from exactly the same people who didn’t lift a finger
to campaign for Corbyn’s tricky Euro compromise against the massed ranks of
Brextremists and Remoaners DOMINATING AN
ELECTION NOBODY CARED ABOUT with dumbass slogan politics.
In the circumstances there are, at least, two things we can be pretty sure will
be remaining. One is the indie music odd couple’s SENSE OF ENTITLEMENT over the Labour Party; the other is the
country’s leading allotment holder remaining as Labour leader. Because the
chances of Kerry, Tom and the rest of the Parliamentary Labour Party installing
some heir to Blair militant remainer as Labour Party leader is NEAR ZERO.
Indeed, there’s more chance of a
double-decker bus crashing into us.
The Reverend Rees and Bristol City Council continue to bang on incessantly about their tired Blairite concept of “LEADERSHIP”. A few buccaneering individuals, we’re led to believe, with the right background, skills and talent must be set free to manage modern public service organisations in their image and inspire us plebs with their dazzling abilities. SO HOW ARE THESE BRISTOL CITY COUNCIL “LEADERS” ACTUALLY DOING THEN?
Well, according to the council’s recently published staff survey, ABYSMALLY BADLY. These highly paid and pampered leaders achieved ratings more in line with used car dealers or estate agents than the cream of senior public service management or anything we might associate with genuine “leadership”. On the question of whether there is GOOD LEADERSHIP within council from the senior leadership team, only 34% of staff agreed. Meaning a MASSIVE TWO-THIRDS OF STAFF felt these highly remunerated individuals were delivering poor or indifferent results.
Worse, on the vital question of “I believe senior leaders are TRUSTWORTHY AND ACT WITH INTEGRITY“, just 36% of staff thought this the case. Meaning 64% of council staff do not believe the leadership at the council CAN EVEN BE TRUSTED. If their own staff can’t trust these ‘leaders’ why should the people of Bristol? How can you possibly lead people if the vast majority view you as a shower of untrustworthy liars and cheats?
When asked if “LEADERS UNDERSTAND THE CHALLENGES OF MY DAY-TO-DAY WORK“, just one fifth of staff agreed. Meaning 80 per cent thought these “leaders” had NO IDEA WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENS IN THE ORGANISATION THEY PURPORT TO LEAD. Meanwhile, less than a third of staff thought their leaders were “Interested and listened to views of employees”.
These self-styled council leaders, then, are not only UNABLE to deliver anything resembling good leadership, they don’t even have the ability to create the impression they give a toss about those they work alongside every day. Shouldn’t they all now acknowledge they’re failures and RESIGN?
The Reverend and the corporate land sales team he’s expensively assembled continue to impressively piss public money up against the wall while the rest of us are forced to tolerate austerity because “THERE’S NO MONEY”. The latest wheeze from the Reverend and his crew is another all-expenses trip to Cannes for that annual abomination, MIPIM: “the international gathering of property sharks” (surely “property professionals”? Ed).
A FREEDOM OF INFORMATION REQUEST reveals that this year’s four day jolly to the Cote D’Azure for the UNACCOUNTABLE to shift our assets to the UNPALATABLE cost council taxpayers almost £12k.
Accompanying the Reverend at our
expense was our dear old friend Colin “Head Boy” Molton, the £1,500 a
day regeneration boss without a proper contract of employment; Nuala
“Hoop” Gallagher, Director of City Growth, Investment &
Infrastructure at the council and the Reverend’s handpicked RELIGIOUS LOONEY FRIEND from his
Hotwells church for evangelical nutters, Jeremy “I’m no housing
expert” Sweetland, the Director of Bristol Housing Festival, keen on
shoving the poor into small, airless boxes to solve “the housing
The £12k bill this little lot landed us with included rooms for each delegate
at around £800 A NIGHT for three
nights and a £200 TAXI FARE to get
Head Boy from Nice Airport to Cannes following his premium £900 FLIGHT from the UK. Presumably because a man as idle and
important as Head Boy can’t possibly get a bus to save us some money?
At the conference the group served up top nosh, drinks and hospitality at a
variety of events and receptions on behalf of some very FAMILIAR INTERNATIONAL CORPORATE NAMES doing some very good
business in Bristol – YTL, Skanska and Arup. Schmoozing services were also
provided to local outfits such as Business West, property company Savills and
the Merchant Venturer front organisation, Invest in Bath and Bristol.
And the point of all this? Who knows? Any purpose and outcome of these
expensive trips is, always, shrouded in mystery and not revealed to the plebs
who foot the bill.
The latest interim consultant ON AN UNDISCLOSED DAY RATE to run Bristol City Council’s half-arsed, partially legal education service is cheery Bath resident, Alan “Stubby” Stubbersfield. Like most jobbing consultants, Stubby’s main concern, rather than the education of our children, is to cover the arses of any fellow consultants so that they can keep their lucrative gravy train on the rails for a few more years yet.
Stubby was recently CONFRONTED at Bristol Schools Forum meeting about the relationship between a gormless predecessor’s decision to CUT payments to educational psychologists and the current inability – ON STUBBY’S WATCH – of the council to complete Education Health and Care Plans (EHCPs) for children with special educational needs.
The cuts were large too. Spend on educational psychologists in 2016 – 17 was £1,159,000, by 2018 – 19 it was £797,000. So, at present, the EHCP process, which should take 20 weeks is taking 40 – 50 WEEKS and without an EHCP a child is deprived of any support in school and – in some cases – even a school to attend.
Stubby’s response was cheerily oblique. “If you look at the attempts to save High Needs Block spend on psychologists … I think probably AN UNFORESEEN CONSEQUENCE of that is in terms of that team’s ability to turn around assessments in a timely manner,” he blandly explained
Exactly what kind of fucking moron is it that can’t foresee that IF YOU CUT STAFF FUNDING, YOU CUT STAFF AND YOU’LL GET LESS WORK DONE? And why would anyone pay this level of moron a six-figure sum of council taxpayers’ money? Stubby, of course, sees it differently and AVOIDS BLAMING HIS INTERIM PREDECESSOR AT ALL COSTS
“I think there’s a question there about the extent to which we are appropriately supporting the ability of the Local Authority through its Education Psychology service to do what’s necessary,” he explained as if it’s all our fault.
There’s another question here too. Why are we paying interim consultant after interim consultant stupid money for stupid decisions they’re never around to account for.
A BIZARRE AND RAMBLING SPEECH from city council social services director, Jacqui “Trust Me I’m a Doctor” Jensen, to Bristol’s long-suffering SEND parents at an event in June achieved little beyond richly demonstrating that Jensen is not up to the job.
an opening gambit, Jensen admitted that the judicial review launched and won by
SEND parents last year to reverse the council’s unlawful cuts to special needs
budgets – cheerily implemented by Jensen two years ago – created “A KIND OF MIX BETWEEN PARALYSIS AND PANIC”
in the SEND department. A department that she’s paid a fortune to run competently.
SO WHAT ARE WE PAYING JENSEN BIG MONEY
FOR EXACTLY? Couldn’t we just get someone in off the street on minimum wage
to create “a kind of mix between paralysis and panic” in the
council’s SEND department? Jensen then went on to make the weird claim that the
judicial review, won at great cost in time and money by Bristol parents, was,
er, “A TECHNICAL PIECE OF
Who knew? When did the council start doing
public consultations at the High Court with the expensive help of a judge,
solicitors and barristers working together to deliver a multi-million pound
bill to council taxpayers at the end? Is this a new best value approach to
consultations from our council tax?
“Not good enough,” heckled one
frustrated parent at Jensen. We agree.