Monthly Archives: February 2015

MARKET FARCES: THE MYSTERY OF THE MISSING REPORT

What’s happened to this report on the city council’s crisis hit MARKETS SERVICE their Audit Committee has been promised by council bosses since September?

It didn’t appear in November. It didn’t appear in January. Although a minute from January assured the committee, “a report on the Markets Service will be presented to the Committee at its Meeting on 6th March 2015.”

Alas, there’s no sign of any such report on the agenda for 6 March now either. What on earth’s the problem? Where is this report? Why’s it taking so long?

Facilties Management bosses and their boss Robert “SPUNKFACE” Orrett have now had THREE YEARS to come up with a rational explanation for what looks very much like open corruption and theft in this department and the blind eyes turned.

However, we do note some small changes over the six months we’ve been waiting for this report to appear.

Initially it was going to be delivered by the senior boss responsible, SPUNKFACE. By January he’d found a minion, Charles “DIRTBUSTER” Harding to deliver the bad news. And now it looks like Harding has found his own useful idiot to explain the inexplicable. Step forward lower middle management mug, Stacey Bartlett.

If the buck passing continues at this rate, Spunkface and Dirtbuster soon will be putting forward the cleaner to deliver their report!

Oddly, none of the three were anywhere near the Markets Service in 2012 when former bosses Harvey and Morris “uncollected” £165k of the department’s money and then attempt to dispose of any troublesome whistleblowers to cover their tracks.

Presumably we can expect this thriller of a report in May then?

BENT ASBO WATCH: INTRODUCING THE COUNCIL’S ‘NOT-AN-INVESTIGATION’ INVESTIGATION

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Mentally retarded council housing boss Nick “DROOPER” Hooper is getting himself into a right old pickle with his INEPT attempt to ASBO a pair of environmental campaigners from Avonmouth on behalf of the local Tory Party.

Drooper, you may recall, fired off a THREATENING letter to the pair after they hand delivered some questions to Avonmouth’s village idiot Tory councillor Wayne “DUMB” Harvey.

However, now under scrutiny for his bizarre conduct, Drooper is becoming increasingly SHIFTY and claiming that his investigation into the environmentalists was in fact some sort of peculiar “not-an-investigation” procedure!

He claims his letter “was intended to set out the Councils view that the conduct alleged was, from the reports received, potentially anti-social and not conducive to good public administration.”

So does ANYONE have the foggiest idea what the fuck the difference is between receiving reports and forming a view on the basis of them and a straightforward investigation please? Answers welcome below.

Meanwhile, Drooper has now ended all correspondence on the matter of his er, deranged, unlawful and party political correspondence telling the AVONMOUTH ASBO DUO to contact the Local Government Ombudsman instead.

A pointless exercise as we all know the ombudsman is a GUTLESS regulatory quango that will see no problem with Drooper’s quasi-judicial party political antics.

However, The BRISTOLIAN understands that the injured parties have now received legal advice and will be taking the matter further through that route.

This, of course, will cost you dear council tax payer A SMALL FORTUNE in legal fees. And all because some balding OLD TORY TWAT on £90k a year thinks he’s above the law and will not do the decent thing and withdraw a load of old bollocks he’s written and apologise.

What a reckless MONEY SQUANDERING TWAT Drooper is.

This arrogant piece of Tory fuck-up with the fragile ego needs to withdraw his ludicrous claims immediately and save a small fortune in the public money that he’s handsomely paid to have some kind of responsibility for.

OFFICIAL: COUNCIL HOUSING BOSS HOOPER IS A TORY SUPPORTING BULLY!

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All is not going to plan, it seems, with Bristol City Council’s efforts to ASBO environmental campaigners in Avonmouth on behalf of the TORY PARTY.

Readers may recall that the council’s thick and useless housing boss, Nick “DROOPER” Hooper fired off a letter to the two campaigners before Christmas threatening them with LEGAL ACTION for the new crime of hand delivering a letter to idiot savant Avonmouth Tory councillor Wayne “DUMB” Harvey.

Our intrepid campaigners, knowing a load of half-arsed BRISTOL CITY COUNCIL BULLSHIT when they read it, immediately fired in a complaint to the council, questioning the extent of the alleged statutory POWERS claimed by Drooper, his right to SECRETLY SNOOP on them and his apparent DISREGARD for their human rights..

A reply has now finally been received. And we discover that the council has simply IGNORED the majority of the complaint while helpfully explaining that no investigation into the pair took place despite Hooper’s legal threat detailing the conclusions of his. er … Investigation!

By what other process did DROOPER obtain “allegations” against the pair, consider the evidence and form his biased opinion then? Did it all just pop into his head as a vision while high on opiates? Or perhaps he just MADE IT ALL UP?

The council then go on to explain, using their amazing legal logic, that Drooper, by denying the pair their basic civil right of a RIGHT TO REPLY are not entitled to any civil rights whatsoever (such as the protections afforded under ARTICLE 6 of the European Convention on Human Rights)!

Normally at this point, we would say that you couldn’t make this shit up. But they obviously they have!

On the bright side, the council have not DENIED that Drooper is politically biased and doing favours for his friends in the local TORY PARTY. Neither have they denied that the purpose of his letter was to BULLY and HARASS local residents.

So at least we can all agree and publicly state without fear of legal action that Drooper is a POLITICALLY BIASED TORY BULLY BOY.

However, rest assured the matter will not rest here. A matter not likely to be helped by a RUMOUR emerging from the depths of Lawrence Weston that the complaint Drooper acted upon did not even come from councillor DUMB – who’s basically semi-literate and far too busy dropping his pants and bending over the desk for Merchant Venturer Port bosses Mordaunt and Ord to write a letter of complaint – but from local MP Charlotte “BACARDI” Leslie’s office.

Surely known Tory sympathiser DROOPER, Bacard’s office and the council wouldn’t be stupid enough to conspire to issue a blatantly BENT ASBO to help a Tory MP in a marginal constituency just months before an election?

Would they?