Another politician who changed his name to get ahead

Why has desperately ambitious Rob “Aardvark” TELFORD, the nice-but-dim former Green Councillor for Ashley, changed his name to Rob BRYHER? Could it have anything to with his desire to become a pompous bore councillor all over again?

At the local elections last year a lot of sitting Green councillors LOST OUT to Green colleagues standing for the same ward in multiple member wards under the new all-out election system. This was because their colleague appeared further up a ballot paper where candidates were listed ALPHABETICALLY.

The finest example of this was in the Bishopston and Ashley Down Ward where the former Green cabinet member and Red Trouser fan girl Dani “HELL” Radice demanded THREE RECOUNTS in attempt to unseat her own Green colleague Eleanor “Wombley” Combley who had beaten her by 10 votes.

Similarly our old friend Sir Gus Hoyty-Toyty, Green councillor for Ashley and council house sales enthusiast, LOST OUT to his alphabetically superior Green Colleague, Jude “Special” Brew, by less than 50 votes. Taking no chances, Special had already changed her surname from English to Brew prior to the election to get the best possible ballot paper position.

Can it be long before we find others joining Rob Aardvark in attempting to re-enter public life with Yellow Pages friendly names? Look out for Sir Gus 247Abba-Toyty and Daniele AAA1politician on a ballot form near you soon.