It’s been a busy few weeks here at the BRISTOLIAN secret editorial bunker (with a lot of big, big scandalous stories brewing – watch this space!), so apologies for the recent radio silence on the website.
In the meantime, why not fill your time listening to the ever-excellent online radio station and podcast, From Bristol With Love?
The latest edition is #41, and features the musical stylings of Bristol artistes Redlight, The Qeld, and Dub Mafia & Buggsy, with your genial hosts Dick Gherkin and Durston Fletcher expounding on a range of hot local topics, including:
Bristol city centre’s Car-Free Sunday
St Paul’s Festival preparations
Local woman & penis vs man
Louis Theroux impersonator in Somerset
MAYOR WATCH (Your run down of George Ferguson’s latest cock ups)
PS Your super, soaraway next issue of The BRISTOLIAN will be hitting the streets around about Wednesday 7th/Thursday 8th August
At last night’s post-Thatcher Death Street Party public meeting at Easton Community Centre, Bristol Mayor George Ferguson announced an unexpected new platform to his administration – COMPULSORY RIOTING.
The millionaire mayor unveiled the policy after explaining that he’s a big fan of Bristol’s history of radical politics (“as long as it’s not upsetting other people”) – though not such a fan of anything that might actually change how things are now, unless it involves giant solar-powered inflatable vegetables.
In the words of HIS ROYAL REDTROUSERS:
Riot at the right time, and in the right way.
George’s statement last night has left many across the city wondering what would pass as an acceptable riot in our Glorious Mayor’s libertine eyes. The BRISTOLIAN understands that he is not yet able to release a comprehensive ‘riot guide’ on appropriate disorder etiquette.
In the meantime we call upon him to indicate on a ‘right riot’/’wrong riot’ basis which of the following chapters in Bristol’s social history would meet his criteria for a FERGO RIOT KITEMARK?
BRISTOL BRIDGE, 1793
QUEEN SQUARE, 1831
OLD MARKET, 1932
ST PAUL’S, 1980
STOKES CROFT, 2011
NATIONAL RIOTS, 2011
At the meeting IL PUCE regretfully also railed against your favourite super, soaraway scandal sheet when questioned by audience members about his numerous businessinterests, at one point snapping:
I think you must have read that in The Bristolian – Don’t believe anything you read in that.
We have been unable to confirm whether this slip of the tongue was caused by inappropriately-prescribed medication.