Tag Archives: Bristol Conservatives

GREEDY BOSSES SCORE THEIR MASSIVE CASH BOOST

Rejoice! It has come to pass! Two thirds of Bristol’s councillors have voted to RAISE the council’s senior bosses’ salaries by up to 20 PER CENT. Just as we revealed they were conspiring to do in the last issue of The BRISTOLIAN.

An elite group of bosses – already in THE TOP ONE PER CENT OF EARNERS in the city – can now look forward to enhanced pay packets from this month. The council’s three strategic directors will now be struggling along on £136K A YEAR while 29 service directors can look forward to pay packets of up to £110K A YEAR. Up from £90k!

Meanwhile councillors made NO PAY OFFER whatsoever to the rest of their long-suffering, low paid staff whose salaries have STAGNATED for at least eight years. The little people who do all the work can fuck off as far as Bristol City Councillors are concerned.

Many from the establishment political parties – LABOUR, TORIES and GREENS – with the exception of a few maverick Lib Dems, supported this insane salary rise for bosses. Delivered under the guise of a pay policy claiming to REDUCE INEQUALITY between the lowest paid and the highest paid at the council by, er … Increasing the wages of the best paid!

While you expect bent Tories to stuff the pockets of the wealthy with public money, it’s extraordinary that the so-called progressives of the Labour and Green parties back these pay rises for the ONE PER CENT OF HIGHEST EARNERS. Especially when both parties are pretending – during the mayoral elections at least – that they are going to tackle inequality in Bristol.

Both parties also happily supported the unproven claim by Mayor Toryboy that these fat cat salaries have to be increased to attract “THE BEST TALENT“. Because obviously you need “talent” to shuffle paper, sit in meetings and fail to deliver a transport plan for your key capital project don’t you? It also takes “talent”, presumably, to keep your work and its finances TOP SECRET at all costs from the public you serve.

In reality, there’s ZERO EVIDENCE to show higher salaries to bosses improves anything at all. It’s as big an economic myth as the Tories’ notorious “TRICKLE DOWN THEORY“, which claims making the rich richer will make poor people wealthier.

Even the trade unions seem to be in on this CRUDE SCAM to benefit the bosses and not the workers. We’ve seen no public objection from the three main unions at the council – Unison, Unite and the GMB – to this scandalous pay rise for the rich or any attack on the LIES AND DISTORTIONS used to implement it.

Perhaps it’s time for workers at the council to organise themselves?

SECRET HUSTINGS

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A new phenomenon is emerging at this year’s mayoral election – THE SECRET HUSTINGS. Apparently, petrified mainstream candidates, scared of the Bristolian public – and some of the other independent candidates – and the questions they might ask, are meeting carefully selected audiences at UNDISCLOSED VENUES to answer questions.

The main victims of this process – so far – have been INDEPENDENT MAYORAL CANDIDATES Christine “Pete” Townsend and Paul “Mister Tea” Savile who are deliberately NOT invited to these hustings. Coincidentally, both have been raising difficult questions for the other candidates.

Townsend has been highlighting the dubious practice of SELECTION BY WEALTH AND CLASS in Bristol’s secondary schools while Savile has been addressing issues around street homelessness, particularly the council’s REFUSAL to open any of their buildings for temporary shelter to the growing number of people living on the streets.

This situation has already created one wholesale FARCE with Savile visiting FIVE different venues in search of a SECRET HUSTINGS on housing issues. The hustings were attended by the establishment-approved candidates (George, Labour, Lib Dem, Green and Tory) and a selected audience of polite and non-troublemaking housing “professionals” and “experts”.

Savile did eventually locate the meeting and even managed to blag his way in. But how many more wankers are there in this city prepared to run fiascos like this over the next two months under the guise of democracy?

The Bristolian also learns that Mayor Venturer, Labour’s Marvin “Luther” Rees and Tory, Charles “Thicko” Lucas attended another SECRET HUSTINGS at the Business West HQ at LEIGH COURT MANSION in February.

We understand the Merchant Venturer front organisation held a 45-minute audience with each candidate who were, no doubt, GRILLED on their acceptability to the city’s SHADY BUSINESS ELITE. Luther Rees, in particular, is very tight-lipped about this secret meeting and what he’s promised them.

Let’s hope he hasn’t got one public message for us and another secret one for the wealthy elite!

SOUTH BRISTOL BIRDWATCH

THE BRISTOL BLOGGER’S ELECTION WATCH: COMMENTARY AND RESULTS

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Official election results are here

City Council Twitter feed is @BristolCouncil

BCC Live Webcast (from midnight) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jaIwhm17tQs

10.00pm: Polls are closed!

From the Bone Blog:

AVONMOUTH LATEST: Steve Norman reports that he was able to flyer every house in the ward, turnout is up, and result expected between 12-3am.The result swill be a close call between local Tory turned ukip – SPUD MURPHY – and longtime Labour hatchet man John Bees…………both parties throwing waves of footsoldiers at it so Steve has a tough job.

10.40pm: more news on the city council election cock-up. Voters without polling cards were turned away from polling stations this morning as officers had not been supplied with full electoral registers. Wot a shambles. Can the Returning officer resign in the morning please?

10.50pm: ***BREAKING NEWS***

News emerging that City Director, Max Wide, is procuring an independent investigation into the conduct of fat boy Lib Dem Gary Hopkins. More news as we get it.

Hopkins has been spotted skulking around Knowle today with only Lib Dem loser “Steve “In A” Comer for company. No Lib Dem, including fellow ward councillor Chris Davies, will go near him!

11.05pm: Tory MP Charlotte Bacardi has been running around Avonmouth like a blue arsed fly (one of about a million currently in the area) trying to prop up her failing Green supporting candidate, Matt Melia from the “Norman Effect” and UKIP.

11.20pm: UKIP CRAP: polling 30% in results in Labour Sunderland. Rumoured to have won 2 seats in Woking.

11.35pm: BBC reporting national turnout at low to mid 30 per cent. The can’t be arsed win again.

11.50: Lib Dems on 3% down 15% in Sunderland. Ha, ha, ha wankers! May have to adjust my Bristol predictions …

12.15am: They’ve been describing Swindon as “very interesting” on the BBC!

Twitter gossip suggests UKIP could win in Brislington East!

Our so-called rival, Bristol 24/7, suggests we might get a result by 1.30am. So plenty of time for BCC to screw up yet …

12.40am: consensus apart from Labour supporters is that Labour are having an underwhelming evening. It’s all about UKIP.

12.45am: Bristol NW MP Charlotte Bacardi is at the count and exhibiting reading skills as she helps with the Avonmouth count. Presumably hers is a specific dyslexia relating to the completion of political donation forms only?

Steve Norman and entourage have been at the count over half an hour and haven”t decked anyone. This is a victory.

01.00am: Counting underway in Bristol. UKIP may take Hengrove! It’s Lab vs UKIP in Avonmouth. UKIP doing ‘OK’ in Kingsweston but possibly not good enough to win …

01.05am: Bristol West Lib Dem MP Stephen Williams and his entourage “look like the fucking Addams Family”. Their night is likely to be even more horrifying – ‘The Lib Dem Chainsaw Massacre’?

01.15am: results coming in from Birmingham. Bristol still dicking about.

01.20: Switch in Avonmouth. It looks like Tory vs UKIP. Labour’s “Bumbling” Bees “looks well pissed off”. Good.

01.30: Bristol 24/7 reports Tim Kent “may be safe”. Lid Dem meltdown not happening in Bristol. Shit, we’re a wishy-washy Lib Dem city aren’t we?

01.55: Our congenitally useless council appears unable to count ballot papers.

ITV are reporting, “there are precisely 24 tables and none are counting”!

02.00: Avonmouth, Brilington East and Hengrove “look good” for UKIP. This looks like aminor Bristolian political earthquake. Time for the left to rethink?

02.20: Bristol City Council has just confirmed “all the postal votes are in the building”. That’s the postal votes thst had to travel 2 miles from the Council House to the City Academy. It’s a shambles.

02.50: Result imminent?

03.00: that fucking gormless returning officer is blaming “technical problems in the counting of postal votes for delays”.

THE BRISTOL BLOGGER’S ELECTION WATCH: INTRO

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Right. Here’s my election intro’. Apologies for any errors but I can’t be arsed with doing too much research so I’ve just cobbled this together from the list of candidates and relied on my general knowledge. Please post any corrections to the comments.

I’ve no idea about majorities, swings and all the statistical stuff because it’s too boring for words and I really can’t be bothered to look it all up. Anyway, hopefully Paul Smith will pop along to bore us with all that stuff as the night proceeds …

My generalised predictions are: a good night for Labour; a disaster for the Lib Dems; a couple of seats for the Greens and – percentage wise – a good night for UKIP but probably no councillors. My dodgy ward predictions are below.

The wards to watch:

Avonmouth: a three way marginal between UKIP, Labour and the Tories. Plus it has the added ingredient of Steve “The Voice” Norman running as an independent. Steve’s unlikely to win but he may pull enough votes to affect the outcome. If Merchant Venturer apologist and all-round sell-out, Labour’s John Bees loses then Steve will consider it a victory and be back for more in 2016. I’ll call this for the Green voting Tory candidate, Matthew Melia.

Kingsweston: Experienced campaigner Terry Thomas running for UKIP. If they’re going to win anywhere it will be here. The other frontrunners are Tim Leaman (Lib) and Mike Thorne (Lab). Labour to win?

Southville: Greens are desperate to hold this and have brought back Charlie Bolton to fight it. Presumably Charlie wants in so that he can take up full time fagging duties at the Counts Louse for his public school friend, Mayor Fergo? Labour’s Celia Phipps is an entirely superfluous NHS middle manager. UKIP are running too. Green hold.

Knowle: Lib Dem fat tosser Gary Hopkins’ ward. He’s got to overcome a massive national swing and a considerable wave of personal hatred towards him in the ward to hang on. Seems unlikely so they’ll be champagne corks popping in Knowle tonight when Labour’s Chris Orlik romps home. UKIP are running.

Bishopston: Green target seat. They’re up against the Labour Party’s bullying social worker boss Eileen “Meanie” Means. So let’s all cheer her demise. Green gain.

Whitchurch Park: Lib Dem boss, Tim Kent’s patch. Under serious threat from a massive national swing against Lib Dems and local indifference. Up against a middle class gal from Bishopston, Alice Bouquet, just off the Labour Party’s machine politician production line. For some reason they think student politics is the way forward for a working class south Bristol ward. Whoever wins, we all lose. UKIP are running here too. Labour gain.

Redland: Independents for Bristol number one target despite the oddity Stella Perrett being their candidate. Perrett is an old Lib Dem and a former associate of Lib Dem paedo councillor John Astley and so is an odd choice for candidate. The Greens fancy this ward as they desperately triangulate ever further towards the Lib Dems (even down to having bent councillors) and the Lib Dems probably think they can hold on too. This is a test of the Lib Dem vote in their heartlands and will be a useful guide to Bristol West in the General Election next year. I’ve personally no idea who will win but I’ll say Lib Dem Hold.

And the others:

Bedminster: Labour cabinet member Mark Bradshaw’s backyard. He should hold easily.

Bishopsworth: Solid Conservative ward. IfB have local Jon Craig running. Labour gobshite Kye Dudd is running too but will come nowhere; Tory Kevin Quartley will hold.

Brislington East: Mike Wollacott for Labour will hold. UKIP running.

Brislington West: Lib Dem Peter Main has held the seat for years. Is it finally over? UKIP running. Labour unknown Rhian Greaves also running. Lib Dem hold.

Filwood: Labour’s Chris Jackson will hold this easily.

Hartcliffe: Mildly interesting as sitting Labour councillor Derek “Wanker” Pickup was deselected in favour of the youthful Naomi Rylatt. Rylatt is at least from south Bristol rather than imported from Bristol West to bore us all to death with student equalities bullshit. Labour hold.

Henbury: Labour hold for Rosalie Walker. The ward is actually held by Tory idiot Mark Weston, the former chair of the useless audit committee. He personally oversaw the disappearance of hundreds of thousands of pounds and the bullying of whistleblowers trying to expose this. Deserves to lose. Labour gain.

Hengrove: This is between Lib Dem councillor Sylvia Doubell and Labour challenger Yvonne Clapp. UKIP are running. Labour gain?

Henleaze: Lib Dem Clare Campion-Smith should hold this. Another Lib Dem heartland seat. If they lose this then Bristol West MP Stephen Williams is in trouble. UKIP are running.

Horfield: Formerly a solid Lib Dem seat. Can Chery Ann hold on to this Bristol West Lib Dem heartland seat? I haven’t got a clue. UKIP running. Lib Dem hold.

Lockleaze: Lib Dem Sean Emmett is doomed. Gill Kirk for Labour will win this. UKIP running.

Southmead: Jenny Smith, who appeared senile when I met her about 20 years ago, remains the Labour candidate and she will win. UKIP running and it will be interesting to see how they get on.

St George West: Labour’s Peter Hammond’s seat. The fact he’s been living in Manchester for at least 6 months while claiming councillor expenses seems to have passed everyone by. IfB have a candidate – Jane Westhead. Labour without Hammond will hold.

Stockwood: David Morris will hold this for the Tories

Stoke Bishop: Tory John Goulandris will hold. UKIP running.

Westbury: Tory Alastair Watson will hold. UKIP running.

Windmill Hill: Lib Dem Andrew Brown is taking over a big majority from retiring old fart Alf Havock. The hugely entertainingly named Sam Mongon is running for Labour. UKIP running too. Lib Dem hold.

And finally, with the highly public sacking and humiliation of Returning Officer and Chief Solicitor, Stephen “Lycra” McNamara last year for a general level of unbelievable incompetence, we have a new, untried Returning Officer, “God” Zilah Morris. It will be interesting to see if she can continue Lycra’s grand tradition of lost ballots, lost ballot boxes, late counts, creative arithmetic and all-round cock-up.

Early signs are promising as we’ve already had reports of polling stations with incomplete and missing electoral registers.

That should help prevent any fraud! Ho, ho!