During a rambling speech to long suffering parents of SEND children in June, council Education and Social Services boss, Jacqui “Trust Me I’m a Doctor” Jensen, admitted there was “A KIND OF MIX BETWEEN PARALYSIS AND PANIC” in her SEND department. A department that she was paid £150k a year to run with a kind of mix between efficiency and professionalism.
During the same speech she also made the barking mad claim that the humiliating Judicial Review she lost to SEND parents forcing her to reverse the unlawful cuts she had made in her department was, in fact, a “A TECHNICAL PIECE OF CONSULTATION“.
So what is the council’s response to this shambolic performance from their very own VILLAGE IDIOT? Er, a pay rise! At an HR Committee meeting less than a month after this exercise in absurdity by a senior council boss in front of parents, councillors agreed to accept a recommendation from Jensen’s subordinates that “the annual salary for this appointment be set at the maximum of the range for the Executive Director – People role”. The maximum range being £165k. Or a £15K PAY RISE.
What would a council
boss have to do to not get a generous pay rise?
Could confused parishioners with low performing children who lack leadership qualities please note that, while I may be Chair of the St Snoot’s Academy, the parish’s OFSTED ‘outstanding’ high performing religious secondary school, I can in no way be held responsible for any of the entirely unforeseen consequences of the budgetary transformation of SEND resources there. This has been confirmed by Mr Stubbersfield from Bath who was recently appointed at great expense by the school’s executive leadership team on a consultancy basis to develop a convincing alternative narrative for the disaster.
This means blame for the closure of the specialist SEND unit at the school as part of a drive toward improved outcomes efficiency is not something that can be laid at my door. Neither am I in any way responsible for placing SEND children in inappropriate mainstream school settings without support. Nor should I be reproached for any alleged upgrading in so-called ‘off-rolling’ at the school as a result of unavoidable errors. All of this has been confirmed by Mr Stubbersfield deploying various insightful statistics at a variety of illuminating meetings whose minutes are not available for very complicated children’s safeguarding reasons that need not concern us here.
I therefore suggest that Ms Townsend and the ragbag of troublemakers, terrorists and rumour mongers from the parish’s OFSTED ‘Needs Improvement’ Dave Spart Academy who continue to encourage confused parishioners with low performing children at St Snoot’s to blame me for the decline in SEND provision now desist from this nonsense. Instead parishioners need to accept our Parish Committee member for Children’s Worship, Jacqui Jensen from Devon’s vivid explanation, devised with the help of Mr Stubbersfield, that a kind of mix between paralysis and panic has taken hold at St Snoot’s for entirely unforeseen reasons that will never be explained but are clearly not in any way the fault of anyone responsible.
Sometimes strong leadership means accepting that events are not of our making but are part of God’s larger plan. As my mentor, the Texan psychotic preacher and notorious anti-communist homophobe, the Pastor Righteous Loon says, “If God’s Kingdom you are creating on Earth is looking a bit schlonky then blame the good lord using a vaguely relevant biblical quote”.
Going forward, let me assure unfortunate parishioners with low performing children at St Snoot’s that we will be creating an exciting new SEND strategy to replace our last strategy very soon. The ‘quick wins’ we are urgently developing to placate any especially sharp elbowed parents with access to solicitors may even be implemented as soon as next year. In the meantime any of our children’s suffering needs to be understood in context. Namely that God has created a kind of mix between paralysis and panic at St Snoot’s and for such mysterious work the lord can only be praised and celebrated.
A BIZARRE AND RAMBLING SPEECH from city council social services director, Jacqui “Trust Me I’m a Doctor” Jensen, to Bristol’s long-suffering SEND parents at an event in June achieved little beyond richly demonstrating that Jensen is not up to the job.
an opening gambit, Jensen admitted that the judicial review launched and won by
SEND parents last year to reverse the council’s unlawful cuts to special needs
budgets – cheerily implemented by Jensen two years ago – created “A KIND OF MIX BETWEEN PARALYSIS AND PANIC”
in the SEND department. A department that she’s paid a fortune to run competently.
SO WHAT ARE WE PAYING JENSEN BIG MONEY
FOR EXACTLY? Couldn’t we just get someone in off the street on minimum wage
to create “a kind of mix between paralysis and panic” in the
council’s SEND department? Jensen then went on to make the weird claim that the
judicial review, won at great cost in time and money by Bristol parents, was,
er, “A TECHNICAL PIECE OF
Who knew? When did the council start doing
public consultations at the High Court with the expensive help of a judge,
solicitors and barristers working together to deliver a multi-million pound
bill to council taxpayers at the end? Is this a new best value approach to
consultations from our council tax?
“Not good enough,” heckled one
frustrated parent at Jensen. We agree.