Gossip from around the Nazi Post’s city centre flexible workdesk regarding their new editor Pete “Swindon” Gavan.
“When former editor Mike Norton was in charge, everything was at the whim of Norton and how his relationship with Kevin Slocombe (the mayor’s PR assistant) was going. If they fell out, a minor put down by Marvin to a reporter was front page news.
“If Norton and Slocombe were mates, Esme Ashcroft [former Post political editor] was prevented from investigating Marvin’s deal with YTL, conducted in the Far East, for an arena at Filton. Esme left because of it. Now though, it seems the new boss isn’t taking any shit. He don’t care who Slocombe is.”
Neither does anyone else in the city. What’s the big deal about pound shop spin doctor Slo Kev anyway? We watch events with interest …
The Nazi Post, after years of stories about Greggs vegan sausage rolls, lists of the 13 best pavements in Bristol and any other crap with a vaguely local angle their Facebook funded ‘content creators’ can dredge up from Insta or Reddit have finally appointed a new editor.
Please step forward Pete “Swindon” Gavan, fresh from the cut and thrust of the Swindon (yes, that fucking shitehole where nothing’s ever happened) Advertiser. He was recently featured in the Post with a photo that looks like one of his poorly paid content creators might be gently stimulating his rectum. Isn’t it amazing what Facebook will fund these days? Anyway, if Pete wants to know what the fuck a proper story looks like, he knows where to look.
To pad out this miserable news out of Swindon, the Post also announced, in the same story, that “the team is in the process of moving into a brand new city centre hub”. This comes after the long-suffering workforce have been forced to work from their bedrooms for the last two years by multinational shysters Reach who own the whole sad sorry mess of a newspaper.
How the mighty have fallen. Post staff used to work out of the Grey Lubianka, their own office block with its own print room knocking out two daily newspapers a day, Now they get a couple of hot desks in some shared open plan ‘space’ with a broken photocopier, a dodgy broadband connection and some inspirational quotes on the wall that make you want to die. All “Ideal for flexible creatives’ agile working needs”.
Welcome to the living corpse of Bristol’s newspaper industry
In a bizarre outburst of WHITE
LIBERAL GUILT, Nazi Post editor and reformed
tinpot Tory, Mike “News Bunny” Norton, has apologised to his readers
for publishing a large front page photo of the Reverend Rees that didn’t depict
the glorious leader in a pose that his supporters felt made him LOOK IMPORTANT
ENOUGH!
A highly enthusiastic front page splash with the headline “I’LL PAVE THE WAY FOR THE FUTURE”
appeared the day after the Reverend’s UNDERPOWERED
‘State of the City’ speech last month. A speech widely received in the city –
outside the pages of News Bunny’s DELUDED
PUBLICATION – as yet another wholesale departure from lived reality by the
Reverend and his team of clueless acolytes.
However, News Bunny’s cheerleading splash didn’t reflect THE VANITY OF THE REVEREND or his
efforts to create a cult of personality in the way the city’s woke race
relations industry now demand. One of them, Tracie Joliffe, an obscure NHS
middle manager, BLASTED News Bunny
on Twitter, “Was it a deliberate strategy to portray an image of the Mayor
@MarvinJRees like a criminal mug shot?”
The nutty complaint was then taken up by Sandra Gordon from the
Reverend’s official Commission for Racial Equality talking shop. She THUNDERED, “the picture of Marvin
published does not portray our city leader in a pose that reflects this article
– he was delivering a critically important speech to a packed audience in the
imposing Wills Memorial Building.”
News Bunny immediately switched to PANIC
MODE over this harmless front page close-up pic of the Reverend –
which looked nothing like a “criminal mugshot” – even comparing
it to the notorious ‘FACES OF EVIL’Nazi Post front page of 1997, and
published a FAWNING APOLOGY to
bemused readers.
“It was not appropriate,” wailed the city’s latest ESTABLISHMENT SNOWFLAKE, “It
didn’t give Bristol Post’s readership the right message about Marvin’s position
in the city and about the importance of his role or of this address.”
Indeed not. The right message would require a photo of Rees with his head up his arse.
