Tag Archives: Filton

ARENA NEWS

Adepts at the art of reading runes, the philosophy of semiology or the mysteries of poetics and symbology may have noticed the Reverend’s recent PLAN put before his cabinet to “facilitate the necessary cycle lane works on Airport Road”.

So what? He’s building a cycle path on Airport Road in Hengrove? Big deal. But this is what catches the eye – “This proposal seeks approval to submit a Local Growth Fund (LGF) GRANT REALLOCATION request to the LEP”. So why might the Reverend be reallocating a grant and from where?

“Due to the fact that the coach parking scheme on ALBERT ROAD can no longer be completed within the originally agreed LGF funding window, this proposal seeks approval to reallocate £790k to the Airport Road scheme,” breezily explain the Reverend’s transport minions.

Of course, a coach parking scheme on Albert Road is an integral part of transport plans for the Arena at TEMPLE MEADS. If there’s no coach park planned then there’s no arena going ahead at Temple Meads.

So look out for that arena at Filton announcement coming soon and be sure to enjoy your cycling lane on Airport Road instead!

REES’S ARENA BELLYFLOP LATEST

The recent announcement by the Reverend that he was launching a review by bent accountants KPMG of his review of the Arena and standing down the current developers is the final NAIL IN THE COFFIN of an arena at Temple Meads.

However, a new site for the venture seems to have suddenly found favour: the Brabazon Hangar in Filton. A development site owned by Malaysian firm YTL Developments that’s run by Merchant Venturer Colin “TORY BOY” Skellett, Wessex Water boss and former chair of TORY business quango, the Local Enterprise Partnership.

Coincidentally, working with Tory Boy on his new development project at Filton are a couple of familiar faces – former Bristol City Council Strategic Director Place, Barra Mac “NUGGET” Ruairi and former city council property boss Robert “SPUNKFACE” Orrett.

What a remarkably small world it is.

Even more coincidentally, the Reverend stopped off in Malaysia to meet YTL bosses on the way to his pointless China junket before Christmas. So how long before we’re handing over £120million quid plus any overspend and extras of public money to this gang of INSIDERS and CHANCERS at Filton to build our arena on their site and on their terms?

The Filton site is already no stranger to controversy and strange public-private shenanigans. YTL, run by Tory Boy Skellett, purchased the former airport after an extensive marketing exercise on behalf of owners BAE paid out of PUBLIC MONEY and carried out by er, Tory Boy Skellett’s Local Enterprise Partnership.

Another remarkable example of a remarkably small world up there in Filton where conflicts of interest appear to cease to exist.

TIM AND TEX TWO FRACKING LOONS WANT THE ‘MINERALS’ BENEATH HOMES

 

http://www.scifinow.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/mad-max-2-1981-02-g-616x413.jpg

Mr Shorland patrols Filton Airfield in 1990

Word reaches The BRISTOLIAN that north Bristol ‘local characters’ Tim Shorland and Tex Woodward are threatening to FRACK FILTON AIRFIELD.

The pair bought LORD OF THE MANOR titles for areas covering Henbury, Patchway, Filton and other parts of South Gloucestershire. Shorland has said that he bought his laminated back-of-a-van title in 1990 to stop the runway being turned in to a fully functioning airport, to save the area’s rural character.

In 2006 he kicked off again when BAE Systems were trying to sell off the land to be developed and turned into houses, saying the area needed to keep the runway in order to save the area’s aerospace industry. What a do-gooder! Well now that’s gone tits-up he’s threatening to frack us all…

In the last few days thousands of Bristol and South Gloucestershire residents have received mysterious letters from the Land Registry – the official body which records land ownership in the UK – informing them of ‘Lord’ Shorland’s CLAIM TO A STAKE IN THE MINERALS BENEATH THEIR HOMES!

One shocked Patchway resident told The BRISTOLIAN that “householders have received letters from the Land Registry saying Tim Shorland claims that he owns the mineral rights under our land. He told a neighbour of mine that his family has owned the land since 1066! But I understand he bought the title nearly twenty-five years ago. He’s all over the place, some elderly residents thought the letter from the Land Registry meant that the freehold they bought was illegal and this man owns their house!”

Says ‘Lord’ Shorland: “These titles do not affect ownership. People still own their house and the land. It’s only the mines and minerals under their properties we are talking about.”

Why is the Land Registry dishing out threats on behalf of ‘Lords’ Shorland and Woodward without anybody fully knowing what these two with their FELT-TIP MAP actual own? Don’t worry, though – the Chairman of Pilning & Severn Beach Parish Council Cllr Ian Roberts has been on hand to clear everything up:

“I had no idea about these letters,” he says. “This could mean fracking.”