Tag Archives: Property guardians

SCAM-A-LOT TELLING PORKIES (AGAIN)?

 

‘Happy’ Property-Guardians pose at Coombe EPH with Camelot ‘Guardian Manager’ Mark Hurley (left) and Paul Lloyd Camelot ‘Regional Director’ (second right)

After a series of articles in The BRISTOLIAN and elsewhere uncovering the disgraceful and illegal conditions that Guardian-Tenants were living in Bristol City Council properties run by scam landlords CAMELOT, the so-called ‘security company’ has finally responded.

Late last year SCAM-A-LOT hired a PR company EMPICA from Canary Wharf in London to deal with the ‘truth crisis’ in Bristol and their expensive clanking PR machine has finally manufactured some ‘post-truth’ news in a Bristol Post article.

Several cringingly staged photos in the Post show unamed Guardian-Tenants ‘happily’ drinking tea with Camelot Guardian Manager Mark Prize Wanker’ Hurley and Regional Director Paul ‘Porky Pie’ Lloyd at a Bristol City Council property Coombe EPH in Westbury-On-Trym.

There’s just one slight problem… it’s fake!

The BRISTOLIAN can exclusively reveal that the Guardian-Tenant pictured, Kofi Jamoa (far right) claims that at the time of the photo he:

  • wasn’t living in Coombe EPH
  • in fact wasn’t living in a Camelot property at all
  • he wouldn’t live in a Camelot property again after the way he was treated by them
  • was paid £1,500 by Camelot to do staged interviews with the BBC and the Bristol Post

So who are the other pretend Guardian-Tenants in the shot and where do they live? How much were they paid by Scam-a-lot? Readers of The BRISTOLIAN, lets name names!

And so ends another desperate, pathetic and expensive attempt to spin a story by the lying bastards at EMPICA and SCAM-A-LOT.

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT #10

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT, BOOK TEN
Verses 33-34: Attempts to bribe Guardians

xxxiii. In recent days, a most righteous pressure has been placed on evil Property Guardian Company CAMELOT to much belatedly conform to Environmental Health regulations at ye properties they lease from Bristol City Council. But woe! This hath only led to scandalous attempts by Scamalot to BRIBE Guardian-Tenants!

xxxiv. THE BRISTOLIAN can reveal that in order to avoid having to service another shower at one property under EH regulations, Scamalot offered £650 to a Guardian-Tenant in return for leaving ye property, callously stating that this person was “worth less than a shower”.

More verses of this woeful tale of wickedness shall be recounted in Ye Chronicles of Scamalot, Books Eleven to Twelve, run exclusively in THE BRISTOLIAN

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT #9

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT, BOOK NINE

Verse 32: The cursed list of defects at CAMELOT properties in Ye City of Bristol

xxxii. THE BRISTOLIAN hath now visited all seven Bristol City Council owned properties run by ‘Property Guardian Company’ Scamalot that have between them more than 100 Guardian-Tenants, plus a variable number of Meridian workers (30-35 on average at any one time) paying cash-in-hand without any written contracts at one of these (see Ye Chronicles Book 1). A pattern of foul and shocking neglect and abuse can be found in all of these properties. Problems include:

  • Leaks from the roof
  • Extensive damp
  • Urine soaked rooms
  • Faulty electrical systems, leading to repeated shocks
  • Rat, mouse and flea infestations
  • Fire-doors removed by Camelot
  • No hot water
  • 10-20 people using one shower, and in some cases having no showers
  • No response to complaints or the reporting of hazards
  • Failure to secure the properties, or to provide security for residents
  • Lighting removed from hallways
  • Leaks of water into electrical appliances
  • Doors into Guardians’ private rooms smashed in by Camelot employees
  • Threats, assault and racist abuse by Camelot employees
  • Camelot employees searching through Guardians’ personal items
  • Asbestos hazards
  • Reported hazards that led to injuries not being addressed
  • Numerous repairs begun, but never completed
  • Deposits not returned as a matter of course
  • Rent raised numerous times for spurious reasons
  • Illegal fines, backed up by eviction threats if these are not paid

More verses of this woeful tale of wickedness shall be recounted in Ye Chronicles of Scamalot, Books Ten to Twelve, run exclusively in THE BRISTOLIAN

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT, BOOK SIX

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT, BOOK SIX

Verses 22-24: Collective Punishment

xxii. Since the launch of ye court cases by Broomhill Guardian-Tenants to fight for their rights as tenants, vile Property Guardian Company CAMELOT hath issued rent increase notices to other Guardian-Tenants. These notices state that “because of the court cases, extra costs have been incurred by Scamalot and these will be passed on (to you) as rent increases”.

xxiii. This kind of collective punishment is to intimidate Guardian-Tenants from fighting for their rights and to undermine any legitimate combination and self-organising by such rightfully aggrieved and angered persons.

xiv. So what next? Will Scamalot presume to demolish your family’s house if you stand up to them, like ye Israelis doth in ye Holy Land today? Or do they wish to return to the bad old days of ye west country Tolpuddle Martyrs – and transport off to hard labour in ye colonies any of their Guardian-Tenants that dare to form combinations??

More verses of this woeful tale of wickedness shall be recounted in Ye Chronicles of Scamalot, Books Seven to Twelve, run exclusively in THE BRISTOLIAN

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT #7

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT, BOOK SEVEN
Verses 25-28: Ye Interns & Hackney Council

xxv. It is written that in 2015 Hackney Borough Council in London kicked Property Guardian Company CAMELOT out of Hackney for nefarious deeds and most righteously terminated their contract: see in ye Guardian article https://www.theguardian.com/society/2015/dec/24/the-high-price-of-cheap-living-how-the-property-guardianship-dream-soured – or to quote from ye scribe:

…Earlier this year Camelot lost its contract with Hackney Council. Guardians were told that the council had found out that Camelot had misled them about the fees paid by guardians, and that Camelot was using the property to house its own unpaid interns, who were exchanging work at the company for a roof over their heads.”

xxvi. And it has since been uttered at the moot of Bristol’s discontented and rebellious peasants that if Hackney could do this to Scamalot, then surely, by The Name of Ye Scourged and Crucified Saviour worshipped by our Mayor, Bristol could too? “After all,” as spoke up one peasant elder, “Scamalot’s so-called intern scheme in London at best resembleth ye Victorian Workhouse (to work for free for only a roof over your head), or at worst… it spells out the re-introduction of ye hated serfdom!

xxvii. So in that moment the crowd roared in outraged response, “Nay, nay and thrice nay!” shaking their pitchforks and scythes together like one furious beast with many arms and heads.

xxviii. And lo! It happens that THE BRISTOLIAN hath evidence that Scamalot were brazenly running ye exact same system in Bristol, despite such shameful exposure in Hackney. Is BCC fine with Scamalot running a system of “modern day slavery” on their premises?

More verses of this woeful tale of wickedness shall be recounted in Ye Chronicles of Scamalot, Books Eight to Twelve, run exclusively in THE BRISTOLIAN

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT #5

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT, BOOK FIVE
Verses 17-21: Ye Sorcerer Coven of Empica and their labours

xvii. The whistleblowing of Property Guardian Company CAMELOT’s neglect and intimidation, and their public exposure as money-grabbing slum lords, hath led it to employ a PR coven of dark side mages under the shunned name of Empica, a sorcerous circle of fiends that issueth every full moon with their train of bats and wolves from the very heart of foul corruption and evil wizardry in this afflicted realm, Canary Wharf in London.

xviii. So the witches and wizards of Empica signed the pact with Scamalot in blood, swearing to deflect difficult questions and cast glamour spells over Scamalot’s failings by presenting it instead as some kind of housing ‘charity’ dedicated to solving the housing crisis, rather than its reality as a profit sucking slum landlord living off the backs of people faced with homelessness. Yet alas ye Canary Wharf PR sorcerors of Empica, despite their pact in securing Scamalot’s already damned souls for eternal torment, turned out to also be a bunch of half arsed con-artists (much like their employers) and not much up to ye task in hand.

xix. Empica’s first labour was to make a proclamation to the people of Bristol. But is was just a cunning spell to put us to sleep dreaming of happy Guardiantenants, Camelot housing the homeless out of the kindness of their hearts and revolting peasants ruining everything by demanding their rights as tenants (see ye Empica spell parchment attached).

xx. Empica’s second labour was to find a Camelot Guardian-Tenant who was ‘happy’ living in the foul conditions and get them on TV. This was no easy task with the peasants in open revolt. After scouring the hills and dales of Bristol, Empica’s witches and wizards found a Guardian-Tenant who could be bewitched.  A BBC TV interview was then aired on Points West with the ‘happy Guardian-Tenant’ sitting next to PAUL LLOYD (ye disgraced and crooked Regional Manager of Scam-a-lot in the South-West), explaining how he loved living at Coombe EPH in Westbury-on-Trym. However, the white witches of THE BRISTOLIAN smashed the Empica spell, as it turns out the ‘happy Guardian-Tenant’ was not actually living at BCC Coombe EPH in Westbury-on-Trym at all.Instead, he had been kidnapped by Empica/Camelot from a non-BCC property in central Bristol. A ‘put up job’ about as flimsy as Camelot’s reputation in these times of greed and lying.

xxi. And so it was that the white witches of THE BRISTOLIAN were easily able to disarm and safely expose Empica and their shoddy, third-rate PR spells to public scorn and ridicule.

More verses of this woeful tale of wickedness shall be recounted in Ye Chronicles of Scamalot, Books Six to Twelve, run exclusively in THE BRISTOLIAN.

GUARDIAN SCHEME PROVIDES HOMES AND PROTECTS PROPERTIES

A scheme in Bristol that allows “Property Guardians” to live cheaply in temporarily unused properties provides homes for 70 people and protects around 10 buildings from damage and squatters.

Camelot Europe, which operates similar systems in cities across Europe, says everyone benefits from the Bristol properties being used for housing on temporary licences.

Paul Lloyd, South West regional director for Camelot Europe said: “Contrary to recent claims by a small number of people there is no ‘scandal’ over this type of scheme, which has been running successfully for many years in Bristol and throughout the UK and Europe.

“The vast majority of those living in properties across Bristol are happy to have accommodation at low cost on the understanding that they may have to leave at short notice when decisions are made on the future of those buildings.

“Among our clients are Bristol City Council and at the former Broomhill Elderly People’s Home in Brislington some guardians are challenging a legal notice to leave. This will be decided by the courts. Our case is that we have served the notices properly as those currently in the Broomhill property were there as licensees and guardians of the property.

“Bristol city council want to demolish the property to build vitally needed affordable housing and we hope they can progress with that as soon as possible. Broomhill was occupied by guardians longer than was initially expected as the council was deciding on the building’s future

“The licensee status of guardians is vital for the system to work and licensees benefit by paying around 50% or under of local market rate so it is win-win as it protects the properties for the owners and provides short-term cheap living accommodation for those who need it.

“We want to reassure those living in other properties that we will continue to operate in the same way. Having property guardians allows organisations like Bristol city council to protect their properties while at the same time enabling people who need cheap accommodation for a short while to find a temporary home.”

ENDS

Issued on behalf of Camelot Europe by Empica. For further information contact Martin Powell (01275) 394400.

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT #4

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT, BOOK FOUR
Verses 13-16: Ye Disgruntled or Fraudulent Retainers of Scamalot

xiii. It is written that odious Property Guardian Company CAMELOT hath a long roll of employees that they either ditched or who left of their own accord – many of these discharges occurring during their six month probationary period.

xiv. The pattern seemeth to be that anyone with knowledge of housing or EH regulations and who brought the serious problems in Scamalot properties to their managers’ attention were “released” from their retainer duties forthwith.

xv. However, a Scamalot employee named Daniel St. Quintin who defrauded not only many Guardian-Tenants of their rent for his own personal gain, but also his employers of their full share under his criminal scheme of diverting every fourth rent payment into his own account, was quietly allowed to resign in order to stop any adverse publicity for the company. So a fraudster and thief was thus set free by Scamalot with his honour intact, no doubt to carry on with his criminal activities in another realm!

xvi. And yea, this same rogue knight hath since been promoted to Senior Consultant at Bristol employment agency Beach Baker Employment, wherein he now manages investment, assets and corporate real estate, all with the blessing of his former overlords.

More verses of this woeful tale of wickedness shall be recounted in Ye Chronicles of Scamalot, Books Five to Twelve, run exclusively in THE BRISTOLIAN

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT #3

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT, BOOK THREE
Verses 10-12: How BCC and Scamalot Exploiteth Ye Loopholes in HSE Law

x. It is written that Bristol City Council regulates the renting and use of private properties for ye purposes of Environmental Health. But in order to maintain independent EH regulation for public buildings, BCC properties must instead be monitored by the national government-run Health & Safety Executive.

xi. But lo! If a BCC property is handed over to the “care” of a Property Guardian company such as CAMELOTthen it shall be regulateth only by BCC, forming a clear conflict of interests!

xii. This accursed loophole is one of the reasons why Broomhill EPH with its multiple guardian-tenant occupants living in dangerous squalor did not have to undergo any HMO license checks for three years. So the BCC officers responsible merely turned a blind eye to ye brigandage and neglect of Scamalot!

More verses of this woeful tale of wickedness shall be recounted in Ye Chronicles of Scamalot, Books Four to Twelve, run exclusively in THE BRISTOLIAN

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT #2

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAMALOT, BOOK TWO
Verses 6-9: Deny, Ye Art Such A Liar

6. As has been written, it happened that Bristol City Council Environmental Health inspectors were dispatched to inspect Speedwell Fire Station, yet another council-owned building entrusted to ye accursed property guardian company CAMELOT. Herein the inspectors found plagues of rats and other vermin, fire hazards, electric shocks from the water supply, a lack of hot water, an insecure building and many, many other failings of Scamalot’s “care” too numerous to chronicle here.

7. And lo! At this moment the Speedwell guardian-tenants formed into a guild and bravely swore to withhold ye rack-rent from SCAMALOT until the slum landlords had implemented all the recommendations ordered by Environmental Health.

8. It is written that Scamalot then proceeded to fiddle, dawdle and procrastinate, eventually deciding to largely ignore the recommendations. And on the third day Mark “prize wanker” Hurley, ye South West Guardian Manager at Scamalot Europe, arose from the dead and quoth to one guardian-tenant that “Bristol City Council Environmental Health are now completely content – so ye lowly serfs should now pay your rent!” (see ye transcript, preserved for eternity by the white magick of ye BRISTOLIAN coven)

9. Yet ye guardian-tenant wisely contacted Bristol City Council Environmental Health and found out this was a complete porky (see ye aforementioned transcript). So despite the bad publicity and wrath, temporal and divine that cometh down on Scamalot like ye plagues of Egypt, they art still and will ever be outright liars.

More verses of this woeful tale of wickedness shall be recounted in Ye Chronicles of Scam-a-lot, Books Three to Twelve, run exclusively in THE BRISTOLIAN

 

Extracts of Phone Conversations

Guardian-Tenant calls Camelot’s Guardian Manager, Mark Hurley to find out if they have completed all the recommendations made by BCC Environmental Health team:

Guardian-Tenant: You said that you got the ‘thumbs up’ from the Council that everything else was done?

Mark Hurley (Camelot): As far as I am aware, yes.

 Guardian-Tenant: From the environmental health, yeh?

Mark Hurley (Camelot): Yes, Correct.

Guardian-Tenant: OK, Cool. So what’s been done to fix the fire door?

Mark Hurley (Camelot): I don’t know mate. I haven’t been there. One of the maintenance people reported back to me. Why, what’s the issue?

Guardian-Tenant: Well the fire door still looks exactly the same.

Mark Hurley (Camelot): I believe it was the Council that came and fixed that.

Guardian-tenant: Right I know that it was [Guardian-Tenant] who nailed a little piece of ply over the window that had broken.

Mark Hurley (Camelot): Right.

Guardian-tenant: I don’t think anyone else has done anything that I can see. Anyway it just looks the same.

Mark Hurley (Camelot): OK.

Guardian-tenant: I was just wondering if you could tell me what the electrical faults were that have been fixed. You know from getting the electrical shocks and stuff.

Mark Hurley (Camelot): I can’t tell you cos I don’t know.

Guardian-tenant: Oh right…OK. I just wanted to be sure that the electrical things had been sorted. I didn’t want to get any more electric shocks.

 Mark Hurley (Camelot): Understandable.

Guardian-tenant: And like with the rats…there is still like a big hole in the actual kitchen door where the rats can come and go quite freely.

 Mark Hurley (Camelot): Bristol City Council vermin control were there yesterday. They’re all over it. As I said to you mate, it’s quite simply, you know its been reported back to us…rats are going to be attracted to food lying around. You gotta keep the place clean. So that’s part of the problem. They’re all over it at the minute, the Council, they’re sorting it out.

Guardian-tenant: Umm, right Ok. I just wanted to check everything had been done right before I paid anything.

Mark Hurley (Camelot): That’s right. Hang on a second I will see if I can get hold of Kate.

Kate Biernat (Property Manager, Camelot): Hello. Hi. Basically all the issues that you raised have been dealt with.

A few minutes later, phone call to Bristol City Council Environmental Health Team (BCC EHT):

 Guardian-tenant: I’m just calling up regarding an inspection you did. It was on a Camelot property. It’s the Old Fire Station at Speedwell.

BCC EHT: Oh, yes.

Guardian-tenant: So I have just been speaking to our property manager and he says the Council have given Camelot the ‘thumbs up’ that the property is now up to standards.

BCC EHT: I can answer that quite quickly. Your question…the answer would be NO, we haven’t given the ‘thumbs up’.

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAM-A-LOT #1

YE DAMNED CHRONICLES OF SCAM-A-LOT, BOOK ONE
Verses 1-5: Blood Meridian

1. As is recounted in the ancient tomes of Frawd and Skandol, foul property guardian company CAMELOT was entrusted by evil robber baron Lord Red Pants to ‘protect’ seven empty properties. And in 2015, Scam-a-lot then attempted to evict its guardian tenants at Broomhill EPH to make way for an UNLAWFUL SUB-LET to ‘Blood’ Meridian, an employment agency. Yet lo, ye peasants revolted and refused to go quietly, contacting Councillor Mike Woolacott and Kerry McCarthy MP, whilst also requesting an FOI to see the Broomhill contract between BCC and Scam-a-lot.

2. Thus BCC called a halt to this process, and the guardians remained in place. However, Scam-a lot simply brought Meridian to Brentry EPH, another BCC property entrusted to its care. And herein, after evicting the existing residents through INTIMIDATION by Meridian gang masters, it installed successive relays of more than 30 migrant workers, each being forced to pay £90 a week cash-in-hand for sub-standard accommodation! Yet when Meridian was questioned about why it had abandoned its plans for Broomhill, it failed to mention any BCC intervention – and simply stated that Broomhill was a ‘shithole’ – ie. unfit even for its minimum wage work gangs.

3. And lo, ‘Blood’ Meridian became a single ‘property guardian’ on the premises! This entry of a private company as a fictitious individual paying a ‘fee’ is the only written record for the masses of short term contract-workers moved through Brentry over the past year – while their labour was sucked dry by Blood Meridian.

4. And the shocked angels in the firmament around City Hall do now chant in multitudes across the heavens: “Surely it is not legal for Scam-a-lot to sub-let Brentry EPH to a ‘single guardian’ that is in reality an employment company, and in which to house its legions of underpaid workers? Does this foul deed not breach Scam-a-lot’s contract with BCC? And fie, fie, and thrice fie, why didst not BCC intervene when Scam-a-lot did this a second time? Are BCC happy for their properties to be used by blood-sucking parasite gang masters???”

5. And it is further written that PAUL LLOYD, ye disgraced and crooked Regional Manager of Scam-a-lot in the South-West, even claimeth that he “never visits Brentry” and has no idea what is going on there!

More verses of this woeful tale of wickedness shall be recounted in Ye Chronicles of Scam-a-lot, Books Two to Twelve, run exclusively in THE BRISTOLIAN